PERSONAL PROBLEMS
The Forerunner’s question in this department of the June issue, reached a good many, it would seem. Here is another response:
“When people must wake up too early every morning, half dead, or at least half asleep, to begin the ceaseless, monotonous daily grind, keep at it all day until half dead or at least half asleep until too late at night, for the mere privilege of existence, they are too tired to wake up and LIVE—the rest of the night.
When people are entombed in conventions, customs, Beliefs! from which they may only be freed by digging, filing, gnawing, scraping, wearing, themselves as well as their way out, few have the strength and spirit to emerge and LIVE—only occassionally one comes out alive.”
“Such purely personal questions as ‘how may I, half (or truly a minute fraction of that) educated, half alive by reason of ill-health, wholly unaccustomed to push my way in the world, grub out an existence and keep out of the poor-house, and keep out of the way of others who are doing things;’ seem rather too small, and altogether too numerous.”
A. These “purely personal” questions are the most universal, and open to the most universal answers.
To “Wake up and Live—World size” means this: Your personality is only the smallest part of your consciousness. A child with a hurt finger howls inconsolably; a conquering king with a hurt finger doesn’t know it.
“You” are weak and ill; “you” are half educated: “you” don’t know how to work—Just put “we” for “you.”
“We,” thousands and millions of us, are at present suffering from various wrong conditions. Taken separately, personally, these wrong conditions overwhelm us; each sits down in his or her own little circle of pain, and suffers.
Taken collectively—faced, understood, met, overcome—those wrong conditions can be removed and forgotten.
The writer of this interesting letter (thanks for its kind appreciation!) sees the trouble of living clearly enough, but does not see the joy of living.
In the first place, accept your own pain and loss, whatever it may be, as merely a part of the general pain and loss. Your own, singly, you may be unable to help; but “ours” you can help. Never mind what ails “you”—you can stand it—other people do? The human soul is a stronger thing than you think—you don’t use enough of it. Unless the mind is affected, so that one is irresponsible, it is always open to a Human Being to change the attitude of the mind, and enlarge its area of consciousness.
Human Life is a huge Immortal Thing.
It has been on earth for many thousand years.
It is bigger, stronger, better, than it ever was.
It is on the verge of a new consciousness, a new power, a new joy, which will make our poor past seem like a lovingly forgotten babyhood; and our future a progressive Heaven—growing under our hands as we make it.
And our present! This is our present! Get into the game! You are human life. Human life is You.
It’s a big thing. It’s worth while to be alive—if you are human!
To get a lively sense of historic movement read “The Martyrdom of Man” by Winwood Reade. To get it of life today, read what you like of the rising flood of sociologic and humanitarian books and magazines of today.
When you are socially conscious—a live Human Being—your “personal problems” will take on different proportions. There is no personal trouble so great as the trouble of the world—which we have to face and conquer.
There is no personal joy so great as the joy of the world—which is ours to feel, to make, to steadily enlarge.
Change your own condition if you can, but if you cannot, spread out your life—your Human Life, till your burden is no bigger than a biscuit—to such huge consciousness.
*
“When my children were little and at home it was easy to guide and direct, but now they are in the big man-made world without judgment enough to know that the world standards are wrong, and the home standards of helpfulness and co-operation right.
I believe we are going ahead, and I’m willing enough to help build the road for others to pass over, but must my children hunger and thirst in the wilderness?”
A. This is a wide-spread problem. The trouble lies in our confounding personal and social relations. Our children are in direct connection with us physically and psychically—but not, of necessity, socially. A musician does not necessarily have musical children; a reformer does not necessarily have reforming children. There is no reason why our children should be expected to see things as we do. They may never see the way out of the wilderness as we see it.
They are to love and serve, to shelter, guard, teach—and set free!
We must do our work—and they must do theirs.
*
Here is a question from Detroit.
“I entirely agree with you in believing that children should be governed by reason, and that coercion is a mistake; but how would you suggest dealing with a child before it can possibly understand reason?”
The writer then speaks of the selfishness and rudeness of undisciplined children, and goes on:
“I have always thought that the training of a child should begin from a very early age, long before they can listen to reason at all.”
She is quite right. Child culture should begin as soon as the child begins. The difficulty of the average parent is that he or she assumes “reason” to mean reasoning—oral argument.
In the reaction from our old violent discipline, they use no discipline; and for repression substitute gross indulgence.
When a child learns that fire burns by a mild, safe burning, he learns reasonably; the fire reacts—which is not a punishment, but a consequence. He should learn the rights of others as early as his own, and by similar processes. Real child culture calls for far more care and training than the old rule of thumb, but it is of a different kind.
*
“I am very much interested in your ‘Androcentric Culture.’ Is it your idea that the female organism was the stronger before consciousness existed only, or after that period in prehistoric times?”
For the scientific facts underlying the above work, all readers are referred to Chapter XIV. of “Pure Sociology,” by Lester F. Ward. It is—or should be—in every Public Library, and should be read by every woman in the world—and by the men also.